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Dark-Razvan

Razvan
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Start again?

7 min read
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Hey guys.

It's been a while since my last entry here, and a lot of things has happened ever since, the other day I watched a video at youtube, about Steve Jobs...here is the video:www.youtube.com/watch?v=6zlHAi…

IT really made me think a lot of stuff, the last two years have been really really awful for me,and I've changed a lot, I've dome some stupid shit I thought I would never do.
I made a decision 2 years ago, and I didn't knew what was gonna happen, but like Steve said in the video, I just trusted everything would be okay, and I still do, I'm trying to get back on track, but everytime I try to, something push me back to the ground and it's really hard to get back up.

When my mother died back in march, I jsut felt really bad, because I was the one who choose to move, for what I belived in my heart was the right thing to do(and I still haven't changed my mind), and I still remember our last phone call, when I told her how much I love her...

Right now  I feel trapped, and sometimes I feel like I lose myself, for a long time I haven't had a clue about what to do about it... art was the only thing I kept with me all this time, but I ended up in a job where I couldn't work on what I love anymore, so I started to fall even deeper.

My best friend has stayed by my side all this time, and I wish I coould help her better, she has never turn hr back on me, and sometimes I feel like I've done that with my attitude, not willing to keep going and I'm sorry for that, but now I'm trying again, no matter how much it hurts I'm trying to get back to be me, to do what I love...
two years ago I took a risk, and lost a lot of things in my life, I'm gonna take another one in a few days by quitting my job, and try to build up my life again.


I have a lot of plans that I haven't been able to accomplish due to different circumstances(like I didn't have the money to do so, and my PC died on me..), I'm trying to publish a magazine about art, to help the art community here in Mexico, to help artist to make a living doing what they love to do, and to show them how can you fulfill your dreams if you try hard enough.. and hopefully now I'll be able to do it.

So wish me luck, it's not gonna be easy at all,but that's how life is.

Stay tunned, I'll be drawing a lot and uploading new stuff here once I get my new PC by the end of the week.

Hope everyone is doing good~


Kind Regards
Razvan~



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Hey folks.

I've been wanting to write a journal from quite a while now, but I haven't been able to, for one reason or another, but today I decided to, I just got up , I've been thnking about too many things since I woke up, my mind it's a complete mess.
It's ok if you don't want to keep reading, I just want a little bit of pain and stress reief and maybe writing this would help. So before moving on, some info for my commissioners, I'm still working on your stuff, I haven't been able to work the way I would wan to on your stuff, the reason will b explained later in this journal... anyways, thans for being patient.

So let's get started...

As the tittle says, my lifehas been like a rollercoaster, everytime I just go in my way up, its just to fall really reallu quic.k, and end up at the bottom and even deeper.

Noting has been the way I planned, everything ends up going wrong...ever since I left my home everything in my life just tuns ut pretty bad... everything is just completely ut of control, or at least it was that way a couple months ago.

As I let you know back in december, I finally got a job... but it was really late. I got many debs since my family stoped suporting me economically, I don't blae them of course, but what I really feel bad about, was the fact that they thught I didn't are about them anymore, just because I didn't call them, even thou I did tell them I wasn't able to call, becaue I was broke, no joke, not even able to afford a phone call, sometimes not even able to afford food, I'm not sure what was my uncle's behavior since I left, he drinks... a lot.. and he does some awfulthings whenever he's runk, and my mother always was the victim, cuz she was in a lot of sorrow everytime my uncle was drunk....

I was trying hard to survive, getting some commissions here and there, but yeah, my PC was also dying, so I couldn't work the way I wanted, and everytme I tried to do something I had one, two or more troubles coming out in my way... jeez yeah, it's hard to live on your own, specially when the only thing that you can do to earn some money, is draw, and even worse when your tools simply doesn't work...

However, I got a job after some months struggling to survive... and the work turned out to notbe what I expected.

The job if I feltbad at the beggining there, I slowly started to feel even worse, like trapped, why? because the ind of 'art' I do there.

You know, for a long time, like one and a hlf year, I'v been wanting to do a magazine about art, cuz here in Mexico, art it's understimated, I wanted to change that, not to do the same thing everyone does, jut complain and complain...

So I thought I could actually do something about it in my brand new job,to help it to improve, but I just realize it's the same fucking thing, but worse, where the job of a trained artist wasn't even thought of an important thing, and you know what? they've been in much trouble because of that. I wanted to start changing things,  but nothing changed, and I couldn't help the way I wanted because of more crap happening in my life.

But okay.. I tried something different, I started to practice harder and harder to become a better artist, and it orked, I've improved a whole lot the last month, in a more rapid way than ever. I felt better and better, like I could change stuff finally... I decided to do a gallery show in my city, about people, their inner and their outer self, I wantd to include both, portraits and nude figure, to express different things, I started to look out for friends who would like to be my models(I'm still looking thou), I got a couple willing to do it...
Everything seemed a bit better finally, I'm about to pay all the money of months of rent I owe...


And here comes he fall again... three days ago, on friday 12th 2010, my mother passed away... a heart attack... a lot f things crosed my mind... everything that has happened ever since I moved, striked me at once...

Now here I am, thinking about what to do, I feel a lot of pain, and I have a lot of mixed feelings... and I'm just told to move on... yes I will, how, I'm not sure yet.


Sorry for making this journal too big , just felt the need to write it somewhere.

To my mom:I love you and always will, you'll be forever in my memory...

To my friends: I love you too, sorry if I haven't been able to talk to you, I love you

:iconjohed: I love you really much, thanks for being always by my side, you are an important part in my life , I'm sorry for my behavior, I didn't mean to cause such a pain... I wish I'd know how to really forgive myself, I'l find out...loveisour resistance...

for you: I love you 'desde el principio' how could I possibly do anything to fix things? I wis I'd knew.... but this love has grown, no matter how much time has passed since the last time we crossed words.


Mom... goodbye, we'll see each other sooner or later, I know.

WE should endure...

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Hey guys, it' been such a long time since last time I've write something here... there reason? I've  been without internet for over half a year now, and it sucks, so yeah or all the people that have commissioned me a piece, please be patient, I'm doing what I can since the last months have been pretty hard for my, I've dropped school for money problems and that's the less of my problems... yeah yeah a lor of things are fucked up.

However I could FINALLY get a job so I'll be back soon to deliver all my stuff, I'm deeply sorry for not being able to contact you guys in such a long time, but you're stuff is being done, but since I have no internet it's being hard to get the refs needed to finish... anyways, I'll work on them this weekend that I have enough money to go to a cafe and gather all the info I need.

The only good thing that has happened to me, I'm about to lost it because I'm a monster...

Anyways shouldn't talk about that here since this was suppossed to be just to inform my commissioners, oh whatever..

For you: thanks for all that you've ever done to help me out, I've never ment to be the monster I am now, I really hope you can be happy...143

See you guys, have a happy new year.


Traducción para habla hispana después MEH...

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Hey guys, I just want to let you know I haven't forgot about your commissions, but I had big issues with my PC two weeks ago, thou I friend helped me to get it workin, so I'm back to the hard work =)!
I'm sorry for the delay with commissions, but now I can work on them again :D!

Thanks for your patience :D!
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Hola! Solo querìa avisar que no me he olvidado de los que me han encargado comisiones, pero desde hace 2 semanas tuve serios problemas con mi PC D=!.. sin embargo un amigo me la 'arreglò' (o al menos parece o_o) y ya puedo trabajar de nuevo :), asi que una disculpa por el retraso, ahora ya podrè trabajar de nuevo en sus pedidos :D!

Por su comprensiòn , gracias :)
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Wenu, para no hacer el cuento largo u.u.. la semana pasada tuve algunos problemas inesperados y me quede sin dinero D=... no tengo ni para comida ._.u, así que ando haciendo comisiones para reunir dinero D=... espero me puedan ayudar >.<... ya que por esta ocasión no solo baje mis precios, sino que estoy ofreciendo un poco más de calidad, ya que he mejorado en los últimos meses (al menos eso considero >.<), así que es una buena oportunidad para pedirme comisiones :D!

Básicamente manejo dos tipos de comisión en ésta "promoción de precios" (XD), que es comisión a color, y sketch a color

sketch a color, en 15 dolares por personaje
Rav sketch by Dark-Razvan color sketch commish by Dark-Razvan

comisión a color en 30 dolares por personaje
dibujando hentai 9 cover by Dark-Razvan

el precio puede variar un poquito, dependiendo de la complejidad del personaje(variación mínima)

Además de éstas, también hago mis comisiones regulares, en los demás estilos que pueden ver en mi galería, si quieren información, sólo mándenme una nota :D!

los pagos son preferentemente por... pero si viven en México también puede ser por depósito bancario :)

Espero me puedan ayudar T-T!.. gracias de antemano!

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Hey there, well as stated in the subject... I ask for a little bit help from your side ._. .. I'm sorry to ask it but I really need it >_<

something went wrong with my bank account... and all the money I had to survive this month... just vanished ._.. I'm gonna talk to the bank tomorrow.. but due to the fact that I need to fix some issues about my move to the new place with them.. I guess they wont help any -_-... so yeah... I'm really desperate about this situation... since I don't even have money for food ._____.!....

so.. I'm hopeing to get some commissioners.. so.. if you want anything from me, this is the moment to ask >_<... I have been practicing a lot lately, and I consider I have improved a bit..


So I'll be offering 15 USD (15 per char o=)colored sketches as this ones :

Rav sketch by Dark-Razvan color sketch commish by Dark-Razvan

and stuff like this one in 30 USD (30 per char)
dibujando hentai 9 cover by Dark-Razvan

the prices may vary just a little bit (about 5-10) depending on how complex the designs are (just stuff like armors or monsters uber detailed)


For other kind of style, just drop me a note.

Thanks guys, hope you can help me >.
Payment by  only... I need the payment first >.<, then I'll proceed with your commission o.o!


Note: stimated time to complete your commission, is usually from 2 days, to 1 week, it may take a little bit more, depending on the work load I have , but you'll get it and it'll look good :)


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Commissions

:iconjade-starrz:-sketching...


Gifts/Art Trades

:iconsaiyagina: - Still Planning how to do them xD





CSS style modified from :iconjamaal10:
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Featured

Start again? by Dark-Razvan, journal

like a roller coaster by Dark-Razvan, journal

Fucking New Year+Commissions (commissioners read) by Dark-Razvan, journal

Commissions delay by Dark-Razvan, journal

Commissions!.. please help T-Tu.. by Dark-Razvan, journal